Thoughts with Myself: The Untitled.


I am considering changing my name. Call myself something like Tus Lee. I hope that someone in China adopts my name, or at least a version of it. Of course that’s dumb, but that’s the only way to ensure the continuity of my culture. I can’t really blame Vera Sidika. Why should we complain about her while most of us have adopted foreign names? Somebody might ask me, what is a name compared to skin colour. My answer is that both serve the same purpose; our identity. When I adopted a completely African name for my writing ambitions, I had big dreams. I hoped to rejuvenate the African spirit. The name carries with it the heritage of grandfathers and great grandfathers. I hoped to become a big writer adored all over the world like Ngugi wa Thiong’o. I hoped that just like Eddy is referred to as the Pablo Neruda of Kenya, somebody would Africanise a Spanish upcoming writer with my name. Make them cram my name. Struggle with all the hard consonants and create versions of it, just like Kenyan mcees do in poetry shows.

However, I am now wondering how much of our tribalism is connected to our beautiful cultures. How much of a possibility is it to cut the tree of negative tribalism and leave out the roots, our different cultures. The last terrorist attack seems to be the last straw on our oneness as a nation. Friends from the lakeside are busy updating that the whole government needs to be replaced, not with someone positively tested in the public office, but with their fellow tribesman. Someone from central province just updated that the attack in Lamu was targeted at Kikuyus since they are the majority tribe there. Does that mean we wouldn’t have complained if it were Luos who had suffered the loss. A third fellow from Eastern province commented that there would be no peace till the elections are fair. The big question is, are we so ready to shed blood just for elections. How much do these elections bring to our table? Suppose your favourite candidate got elected into office, what change would he have brought? I am seriously considering changing my name, call myself something like Tus Lee, and hope that someone in China adopts my name. Of course that’s dumb, but that’s the only way to ensure my race is not inferior to others. That’s racism. Oh, that term again.